Funeral Brownies...

At mom's funeral luncheon, there were these divine brownies.  One of mom's friends, Deb Whiteley, was nice enough to give us the recipe.  I will be trying these in the near future. 

Caramel Brownie Recipe


1 package (14 oz.) caramels
3/4 cup coarsely chopped pecans or walnuts
1 can (5 oz.) evaporated milk
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 box Betty Crocker German Chocolate Cake
1 cup flaked coconut
2/3 cup butter (melted)

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Heat caramels and 1/4 cup of the milk in saucepan over medium heat, stirring constantly, until caramels are melted and mixture is smooth. Keep mixture warm over low heat, stirring occasionally. Mix cake mix (dry), butter, remaining milk and the pecans. Spread half of the dough in ungreased 9x13 pan. Bake 6 minutes; remove from oven. Sprinkle chocolate chips and coconut over baked layer. Drizzle caramel mixture over chocolate chips and coconut. Drop remaining dough by spoon onto caramel layer, spreading evenly. Bake until cake portion is slightly dry to touch, 15 to 20 minutes longer; cool completely. Refrigerate until firm.

I use a glass baking dish and wipe some butter along the edges. I found some of the caramel sticks to the edges making it hard to get loose after baking. Also, I take the remaining dough for the last layer and press it between my fingers before placing it onto the caramel. This spreads it easier.

Confrontation...

Sunday morning I had a run in with confrontaion.  This is one word that I can use HATE and really mean it.  I HATE confrontation.  It makes me feel ugly and mad inside.  So here is the scenario:  Hallie had just played a soccer game in the cold rain and wind at 8 am.  They had played a great game but lost it at the last minute by one point.  -Hallie is a defender-sweeper- and stands right in front of the goalie and tries to sweep the ball out so it doesn't make it to the goal.  There are times where it is going to get past everybody and that is when the goalie has to step up her game.  It is never one persons fault when a goal is scored- So the team was huddled around the coach after game getting all their stuff.  I walked over to get her-keep in mind, I woke up on the irritable, emotional side of the bed=(.  and I saw a grama leaned over with her arm around her and her face buried in her ear telling Hallie something.  The grama looked up and saw that I was right there.  She says to me "I was just telling her that she really hurt L. feelings today."(L is the goalie, and L. has said a few hurtful things to Hallie in the past if a ball gets past her and we have just let it go) So I was assuming that the grama meant maybe Hallie finally said something back.  And the grama is talking to me like she is doing me a favor by telling me this as a parent.  I couldn't believe how fast her one statement set me off.  So I said "Well, L has hurt Hallie's feelings many times before so you need to talk to her about that."  The grama asked "When?"  I replied with "the last 2 games."  So now things are getting heated and I new at any moment I might start to cry.  What is with me and crying.  I wasn't sad, I was mad and just shocked and so I guess my body deals with that by crying.  So I said "Hallie let's go and I walked away." 
So on the way to the car I was asking Hallie what she said that hurt her feelings.  Hallie said she didn't say anything.  So I asked her what the Grama said to her in her ear.  She said "You really hurt L's feelings when you don't stop all the balls.  It is really hard to be a goalie maybe you should try it sometime."  That is what really set me over the edge.  How dare her ruin this for Hallie.  She should have walked away from this tournament proud that she did her best.  Even the coach just done giving them the positive speech.  And I feel if there is a problem with Hallie's playing then why was she in the whole game. Not every player is perfect.  I could start listing mistakes that every girl made, but it isn't about that.  It is the fact that she turned this into a negative. And if the parent has a problem with something it should be told to the coach.  Everyone knows the goalie is a hard position, but no one goes to her and tells her it hurt their feelings because she missed that ball.  They actually go up to her and say positive things like "it's okay."  "We will get em next time"  or others. 
Brad was already at the car and so when we got in I just started crying and Hal was upset.  Again, don't know why I was crying.  Brad was like "what the heck happened."  He must think I fell off my rocker=).  I just wished I could have said something witty back, or knew excactly what she was talking about.  The problem was that once I started crying I couldn't stop my cryer.  I dropped Brad and Hallie off and went to the store to get donuts.  I was just really upset and it took me quite some time to cool off.  I sat in my car saying a little prayer.  It finally went away.  Later I talked to Hallie and told her that she did a great job on her game, which she did.  And that I could go to the coach and to the lady and make a big to-do but that won't change who they are.  We can control who we are.  You will know in your heart if you did your very best and that is all that counts.  Inside me wants to go and say something to the coach.  And I really want to tell that lady "Do not touch or talk to my daughter again unless it is a positive "good game".  Or do I just let it go?  The season is over for now.  They have a soccer party Saturday and then they have a month break until indoor starts.  Hallie is over it.  And probably thinks I over reacted, which I probably did.  I don't like having ill feelings towards people and need to figure out how to change that.  I know I will see this lady again.  What do I do?

Pondering...

I got to work early last week.  I was parked doing some pondering in my car.  I looked over and there was this most beautiful tree.  I park by it all the time, but with the season change it became this beautiful fire-ee vivid tree.  I need to find out what kind of tree it is.  There is something about nature beauties that are calming to my soul right now. 

Flag Football...

 Jase completed his first season of flag football.  He is #33.  I didn't get a super ton of pictures.  He had mixed feelings about it.  He loved the games and scoring, which he did a handful of times.  But he didn't love the practices but they kept him busy and out of trouble.   

Jase is the one on the left front. 

It was fun for him to go against some of his friends from school.  We will see if he does it again this next year.  He is really missing soccer.

St. George Vacation...

In September I took myself on a retreat. We went last year and after having so much fun decided to make it an annual thing. Since KD moved there, I was the only one that had to travel. For about a week before the trip it was an up and down on and off again thing as to where I wasn't sure I was going to make it. After much stewing I finally was on the road. It took me about 9 hours. Some people thought I was crazy driving by myself. The drive went surprisingly fast. I only had to stop twice. It gave me a lot of time to think and just listen to music, and just get in tune with myself. My mom wanted to tag along but she just didn't feel good enough to make it that far. Once I got there I stayed at my sisters for the first few days. I made them pancakes, and let them help make choc chip cookies. It really made me think about how I have gotten out of the habit of being with my kids. I am not as patient with them in letting them help me or just be there for them without the house work, or computer, or other distractions becoming more important. When I was at KD's it was fun cooking with them and hanging out. I need to have those same desires at home.

After a few days, we checked into the Trendwest Condos there. They were so nice. We watched lots of fun movies: Letters to Juliet, Back-up Plan, Dear John, The Last Song, Date Night. We got to attend to Live productions at the Tuachan Theatre. Tarzan, and Crazy for You. This is a beautiful outdoor ampi-theatre set against the canyon. I got a massage, went to a yummy cupcake store called The sweet tooth fairy. We must have both been in the mexican food mood, because we ate a lot of mexican. It was really good. I brought my ribbon and while watching movies I made a handful of bows. We sat around the pool. We had the pool all to ourselves most of the time. The condos are at the top of a hill, so we would take a walk in the mornings and walk to the bottom and back up. It was the perfect incline for a great walk.

My drive home started on Wed. September 22. I left in the morning. I made a pit stop in Salt Lake at the Wood Connection. It is this really cool wood store that someday I would like to have a small store like it. I saw some really cute ideas, but I couldn't force myself to buy any of it because I knew I could go home and make it. That day was actually Kell's birthday, so I stopped in Burley for the night. My mom and dad came into town and met us for dinner. We went to the Uppercrust. My mom looked so weak and tired. I mentioned to Brad that she is aging a year every hour. It was so good to see her. Who knew that would be the last time I would see her. What a special day.

I stayed the night at Kell's house that night and finished my trip home the next morning. It was good to get away, but it was so nice to get home and see my honey and kids. Brad is so incredible to let me go. I didn't even have to worry one time if the kids were okay. He is such a good Mr. Mom. He is even better at being mom then I am. It was a fun time. We are already making plans for next year.