Emotional Eating

I have always known that I am an emotional eater, but it has sure stepped up since I had my baby. I can use all the excuses but it all comes down to I love food and it makes me feel good. So it is time to change that, because the momentary fix of eating crap is making me more tired, sluggish, moody, and the obvious, I am not getting any smaller. My goal is to lose 5 lbs a month until my birthday. Before I got pregnant, I had lost almost 30 lbs. So I know it is possible, and I really learned a lot about health and fitness, so I know I can do it-(I have to stop using "SO".) I usually wake up ready to conquer the world. I have my morning motivation. But when 3 pm hits, my afternoon motivation kicks in, or should I say, my lack of motivation. I start to feel tired, munchy, and moody. Then if I eat something bad, I figure my day is ruined so why eat a good dinner. Then I go to bed feeling crappy.

So I am going to change that. I am going to start taking care of me. If I announce it to the world then maybe I will stick to it better. So tomorrow I will be taking measurements and a before picture (Yikes). Then on my birthday in June, I will be taking an after picture and measurements. Hopefully everyone will be able to see a new woman. If any of you want to join me on this quest, let me know, and let's do this together. I have a program I am going to follow, I just need to do it. Consider this my public announcement: I am officially on a quest for a better me.

Miracles

A miracle happened at our house yesterday. I was taking a big chance when I went to work at the cannery yesterday because Livee has not yet taken a bottle plus I forgot she had her 6 month appt. (better late than never) and Brad was going to have to take her, plus she is such a mama's girl. She knows if I am not with in the 10 ft. radius of her and tends to get cranky. I just have wanted to get her to take a bottle just in case I wanted a few hours away. Well, I new she would be fine for the first 4 hours because she can eat baby food now, and she usually naps, but I didn't know if she would last the whole six hours. So Brad made it through the Dr. visit & the shots, Poor little Livee. I had to write down the answers to all the questions he was going to be asked. And they came home and he fixed her a bottle and SHE TOOK IT!!! Brad said she just took it like she had done it 100 times before. She drank about 1 1/2 oz. and was fine. It was so funny when I got home and she spotted me. She just started smiling in between her little begging cry wine thing she does when she wants to nurse. So, yes, miracles do happen.

Mean Mom

Do you ever have those moments where you want to just go in your room and shut the door and just have a little quietness? Oh-did I ever have one of those evenings. Hallie was really trying my patience tonight. Lately she has been quite mouthy to everyone, and Savanna was teasing her and so she told Savanna to "shut-up". She knows better and she doesn't even get warnings for stuff like that anymore. So I told her she was not to go out front the rest of the night. All her friends were out there and she loves to play. You would have thought I cut off her right arm the way she was crying and screaming and rolling on the floor. So I told her to go to her room until she could come out and be in better spirits. Well, after a while I thought she was going to fall asleep, so I had her come out and she was suppose to help with the green beans. I am canning green beans right now. I had put a movie on, got them all a bowl, and all they had to do was sit there and snap them while watching tv. Hallie told me she didn't want to help with the beans. I said fine, but then you can't play tomorrow after school either. So she was pouting about that. Then she wanted some of the fruit I had cut up earlier, while she was in her room. She went over to fix herself some and said it looked gross and wanted a new banana. I told her no because it was perfectly fine, and no sense in opening a new one and throwing away what is already open. So then she got all worked up about that and kept going on about wanting to play out front, and how she didn't want to do beans. By now, I was pretty close to really having a blow out with her. It was about 6:30 pm at this point, so I told her she could go to her room for the rest of the night. She can come out for dinner and to go potty, but that is it. She instantly turned into this convulsing frog thing on the floor, crying and begging me that she wants to help do the beans. That is when I started laughing. Sometimes I just have to laugh at how worked up kids get about the silliest things. So while she is in her room I am down stairs snapping beans. I can hear her up there just sobbing and crying. In between the crying she says some funny things. Here are a few of them:
"Why do you have to torture me like this."
"I will do anything mom"
"Why won't you listen to me."
"I want to live, I don't want to die."
"Just give me one more chance."

She finally settled down, and then Jase thought I needed more to deal with. Here is how the conversation went;
mom-"Where you going with that cup?"
Jase-"Somewhere"
Mom-"The cup needs to stay in the kitchen"
Jase-"But Mom, I want to grow a seed in it"
M-"What kind of seed"
J-"I don't know"
M-"Where did you find the seed?"
J-"It looks like someone left it in our yard"
(I am remembering at this time I have boxes of peaches in my garage)
J-"It looks like a peach seed but it isn't"
So I decided I better go and check on the peaches. I go out the front door and Jase and the neighbors have decided they would help themselves. They had thrown them on the road and sidewalk and smashed them. Luckily only about 7 or 8 peaches were destroyed. But of course Jase said he didn't know how they got there. Finally the neighbor girl fessed up that it was all of them. Aleena backed up the story, she hasn't figured out the fibbing thing yet. So needless to say, I had to send Jase to his room for the night. That had him all upset, and he fell asleep in the door way before he even got dinner. He will probably be hungry in the morning.
I won the mean mom award today. I wish I could get it through to my kids, that if they choose the right they can have lots of freedoms, but if they choose the wrong they get those freedoms taken away. Hopefully they will catch on to that concept before they have to start making major decisions.
Sorry about the long blog today. I am just needing someone to vent to. It helps to get it all out before I go to sleep. It kind of cleanses the soul. Thanks for listening.